When All Is Lost
by lissanae
Summary: When good girl Bella moves in with her uncle, she starts to fall in love with bad boy Edward Cullen. One of the two will have to change for this relationship to work, but which one?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Please feel free to leave suggestions/comments.**

She sat up and looked around her. Blinking her eyes, she couldn't figure out where she was. The wind blew through her open window, moving the curtain, letting in light. She then remembered. Forks, Washington. She could hear a light pitter patter of rain falling on the roof. The clock said it was only four. She still had two hours of sleep before she needed to get ready for school. She knew she wouldn't sleep, falling asleep had taken enough work the first time. She slid out from under her covers, put on her slippers and robe, and quietly slipped out of her room. She tip toed down the hall, and opened the last door. Her uncle Charlie was snoring loudly, she had been able to hear it the second she opened the door, but she had to see him, to make sure he was there. After closing his bedroom door, she silently made her way down stairs and sat on the couch looking at the TV. She turned it on, and turned the volume down very low. She flipped through the channels, multiple times. After landing on another show about dancing to lose weight, she turned the TV off. 'American TV,' She thought to herself, 'I hope it's better during the day.' She walked back up the stairs to her room. Grabbing a book she laid back in her bed to read. She was just getting to her favorite part of the story, when her alarm clock went off, making her jump. She turned it off and went to her closet.

"What do you wear to school, when you can't wear a uniform?" She asked herself out loud. She finally settled on a long sleeved, white shirt, and her plaid skirt from her old school. She brushed her hair, and went down for breakfast.

Charlie was sitting at the kitchen table, eating a bagel, reading the newspaper. He wasn't that much older than her, only about three years. Her grandparents adopted him, after she was born. "Bella," He said, noticing her. "You look..." He stopped, not knowing what to say.

"This is what I wore at my old school." She said shrugging.

"You know, they don't wear uniforms?" He asked, taking a sip of coffee.

"Yeah, but I didn't know what else to wear." She said.

He thought for a moment, "How about some jeans?"

She nodded her head, "I'll change after I eat." She set out to make herself an omelet. As she stood at the stove, she remembered the last time she had an omelet. A tear made its way down her cheek. Before she could stop herself, more tears were coming, she tried to stay quiet, but Charlie noticed.

He stood up, and wrapped his arms around her. "Bella, it's okay, everything will be okay."

As soon as she could talk again, she said, "I'm not hungry any more." She turned off the stove, and went to her room to change.

On her dresser was a picture of her parents. "I miss you." She said to it, before opening her closet. She picked out a pair of dark jeans and a light blue tank top. She took the hair out of the pony tail, and put on some make up. She then went into the bathroom to brush her teeth.

When she came out Charlie was leaning against the wall. "Ready?" he asked her. She nodded her head.

They went out side and got into Charlie's car. The drove mostly in silence. "We can get you a car, if you want." Charlie offered.

"Yeah, but I'd have to get my license first." She said, reminding him.

"That shouldn't be too hard, didn't you have your license in England?"

"Yeah. I don't think I want to drive, not yet anyways." He looked at her, and understood why. But she was determined to play it off, "You know, still getting used to being on the right side of the road." He smiled.

They pulled into the high school parking lot, finding a spot, instead of just pulling up to the front doors, like she had expected.

"You don't have to come with me. I can do it." Bella said to him.

"Yeah, but I wanted to say hi to some people, if it's okay with you."

Bella kept forgetting that he was young, he probably had friends still in high school. "Yeah, it's fine."

"Charlie!" She heard a voice call, as they got out of the car. A big man came up to the car, and put an arm around her uncle. "What's up man? Haven't heard from you in a while."

"I've been busy." he said, looking at Bella.

"Oooo, new girl huh?" The man said, looking over Bella.

"You could say that." Bella and Charlie both laughed. "But this is the girl, that if you make a move on her, I'll have to kick your ass."

"Don't like competition do you?"

"No. Not at all." Bella was still smiling. "Come on Bells." Charlie and Bella walked into the building still laughing. "Sorry about Emmet."

"Charlie!" A girl screamed from the end of the hall. "Charlie!" She yelled again, as she ran up and hugged him.

"Alice! How are you?" The girl in front of them was short, but seemed like she could do some damage.

"I'm okay, how are you? What are you doing here? Who is she? Why haven't I met her? Are you two dating? What's your first class?" She addressed Bella on the last one.

"Alice calm down, let her get in the building." Charlie said, leading Bella away towards the office.

"Okay, bye new girl, hope I see you soon." And with that she had run back down the hall, disappearing into a classroom.

After getting her schedule, and saying goodbye to Charlie, who promised to come eat lunch with her, she went off to find her first class. It was US history. She had already taken it in London, but they called it "The history of the United States," so she was sure she would be able to pass it.

She tried sneaking into class, not to make a scene, but she ran into a desk fell. Luckily, there were only a few people in the room, most of them didn't even notice. An old man, with white, balding hair came over to her.

"Can I help you?" He asked, after she had gotten to her feet.

"Yes, I'm Isabella, I'm new." She replied, sticking out her hand to shake his.

"Oh, yes, they told me you were coming. You have a wonderful accent. Reminds me of my days in the war."

"You were in the war?" Bella asked, looking around her as the other students began filing in.

"Yes, World War Two, stationed in England, never did any fighting though." His eyes glazed over, and her seemed to be in a trace, she used it as an excuse to find an empty seat in the back of the classroom. The bell rang, taking the teacher out of is trance. "Good morning," He said, as the last of the students took their seats. "We have a new student, Bella." He pointed right at her. "She is from England, please show her what a wonderful and friendly country America can be."

That was it for the torture. The lesson began. She already knew everything, so she used the time to doodle in her sketchpad.

"Is that Charlie?" The boy next to her said, leaning over her shoulder.

She turned to look at him, he was gorgeous. "Yes."

"I thought you just moved here. How do you know him?"

"I live with him." Bella replied, closing her sketchbook.

"Oh." He looked a little saddened by this news. "I'm Edward."

"Bella." She stuck out he hand to shake his, and was slightly offended when he didn't take it.

"I don't shake." He whispered, as the teacher looked in their direction.

They didn't talk for the rest of the class, but Bella secretly hoped for another chance to see him.

As she walked into her next class, science, she was surprised to see him already sitting in his seat, when he saw her, he tilted his head to his right, signaling for her to sit next to him.

"This is the only open seat in the class." he explained, as the bell rang loudly/

The teacher seemed flustered as she came in. "Good morning class!" She practically sang to them. "Oh, Hello dear, you must be Isabella." Then she proceeded to teach the days lesson. To Bella's excitement, lunch was right after science.

"Bells." She heard Charlie calling to her from the cafeteria entrance. He hugged her, "How's it going?"

"Okay so far." What she really meant was that nothing too embarrassing had happened...yet.

As they made their way to an empty table, everyone seemed to know Charlie. Many of them nodded in his direction, or called out his name.

"You seem to be very popular around here." She noted, as the sat down.

"Well Bella, I only graduated here two years ago, and I have thrown some spectacular parties over the years."

"I was always told you were wild during high school." She said, taking out her sandwich.

"Yeah, I still am, but now my parents don't know." He winked at her, as the boy from earlier, Emmet sat down beside them.

"Hey Bella." he said.

"Hey man, I told you. You make a move on her, I kick your ass." Charlie reminded him.

"Yeah, yeah, I know. So what's this I hear about you living together? Isn't that like illegal?"

Charlie burst out laughing. "Emmet, meet my _niece_ Bella."

"No way, your niece, you aren't that old." He didn't seem to get it.

"Charlie is my uncle." Bella said.

"Wow, so you aren't dating?"

"No." Bella and Charlie said at the same time.

"Cool," Emmet said, "So if I did want to, you know ask her out, you'd be cool with it, right?

A girl with long blond hair had walked up behind him, "He might be, but I would not." She smacked him on the back of his head and walked away.

"Rose, my girlfriend." He explained as he got up to run after her.

They sat there talking about Bella's classes, and teachers. She constantly felt like someone was watching her, but couldn't figure out who.

As they got up to throw away her garbage, she noticed Eward Cullen sitting in the corner, looking at her. As soon as she looked at him, he got up and walked away.

**A/N: So...What do you think? Any suggestions, ideas?**


	2. Chapter 2

She kept an eye out for Edward the rest of the day, for some reason she was very curious about him. It was probably just the way he seemed to have been watching her. As soon as word got out that she was Charlie's niece and not his girlfriend, she seemed to be getting more attention from the boys, and less from the girls. One girl was still nice to her though.

"Hi Bella," She had said, as Bella took a seat in the English room. "Alice, remember?"

Bella laughed silently to herself, of course she remembered. "Nice to meet you."

"England, huh? Must be nice there. Wish I could go. Maybe I'll go there this summer. Maybe you could come! That would be amazing. So what's it like living with Charlie? Must be great! He throws awesome parties. I've only been to a few, my brother doesn't usually let me come. I think you met him. Emmet, the big tall guy. Yeah. He's dating Rose. She's great, except when she's in a mood, then you should stay out of her way. And I'm dating Jasper. It feels like we've been together forever, he's such a great guy. And my other brother.." Bella was glad that the bell rang, she was beginning to get a headache.

The day went smoothly from there, even gym went pretty well, they were playing volleyball, and she only fell once or twice. She kept looking up at the clock, willing it to go faster, All she wanted was for Charlie to pick her up and Take her home so she could sleep. She was glad she started school on a Friday, she would have the whole weekend to recover.

When the bell rang at the end of the day, she was the first one to run out of the building, Charlie was in front waiting like he promised.

"How was it?" He asked as they pulled away.

"Oh you know, school." She shrugged it off.

"Good, um... we're having a feel people over tonight."

The last thing Bella wanted was a party, but she knew that Charlie was giving up a lot to take care of her. She was supposed to move in with her grandparents, but she called Charlie and begged him to let her come live with him. The last thing she needed was her grandmother's constant nagging.

They pulled up in the driveway, and Bella started up to her room. "I'm going to call some friends." She said, making it clear that she needed some privacy.

"Okay, people will start coming around seven, you;re free until then." Charlie began cleaning up. The house was fairly large, and Bella considered helping, but knew he would understand that she really needed to talk to some of her friends.

She turned on the computer sitting on her desk and logged on. She saw that her best friend Max was on. She picked up her headset and put in on.

"Max?" She asked as soon as the connection was made.

"Bella! How the hell are you? How's America?" Max sounded excited, but tired at the same time.

"I'm okay, first day of school was today." Bella wished she had her video camera hooked up, so she could see him. "What are you doing?"

"Just finishing some homework, I want to get it all done, so I have the rest of the weekend free, then I'll probably go to bed.."

"Oh, Max! I forgot about the time difference."

"That's okay Bella. I''m just glad I got to hear your voice again."

Bella started crying. "I miss you so much Max!"

"I miss you too, and so does everyone else. How's Charlie?" She could tell he was trying to distract her, but he was failing.

"He's good. It's kind of weird though. He's in charge of me, but he's only a little older. A bunch of people from my school are coming over for a party later." She giggled at the thought.

"That should be fun." Max yawned.

"You should go to bed." Bella had always acted like his mother, "Make sure you take your medicine."

He laughed at her "Yes, mother. Oh crap!"

"What?"

"I haven't been taking it." Max laughed at himself this time.

"I'll make sure I remind you everyday. Will you do me a favor? Will you call me when you wake up? No matter what time it is?"

"Yeah, I love you Bella."

"Love you too." With that she logged off, and sat on her bed.

She missed Max most of all, but she had been constantly thinking about her other friends too.

After sitting in her bed for well over an hour, slipping in and out of her day dreams, she heard the doorbell go off. It wasn't even five, so it couldn't be the guests. She headed down to see who it was.

Alice and Rose were already in the living room, cleaning and decorating. Alice noticed Bella first. "Bella." She was suddenly wrapped in a hug. "We came to help get ready. I hope you don't plan on wearing that for the party tonight. We are going to make some homemade pizzas, do you want to help?" Bella backed away, hoping Alice wouldn't notice.

"I am not wearing this for the party, and I'm not very good with cooking. I fall down a lot."

"Don't be so modest Bella," Charlie said, coming into the kitchen, "Bella is a great cook, but I actually have a special job for her." He motioned for her to come in the kitchen with him, leaving Alice and Rose in the living room.

"Bella, are you really okay with everyone coming over?"

"Yeah, don;t worry about me, I'm fine. I just need to get some air that's all." He could obviously sense something was wrong.

"There's a path in the back, through the woods, stay on it and you should be fine."

She got up and slipped on her tennis shoes, and made her way to the trail. She started walking, but as soon as she saw that most of the ground was flat and clear, she started running. As she ran she was able to forget everything that had been going on, for the first time in two weeks, she forgot about her parents. She ran as fast as she could. She had always been a runner, she was much better at running than walking. It was a miracle that she didn't run into a tree in this forest, but it was nice. In London she only had the streets to run on, and occasionally her parents would let her go to the country to run.

The sun had started going down, so she pulled out her phone to see the time, it was almost time for the party to stop. She ran back to the house and ran up to her room to change.

"You are wearing that?" Alice asked, as Bella came down the stairs in her jeans and a black shirt.

"Is something wrong with this?" Bella asked, looking down at her outfit.

"No, not if you're going to your grandmother's." Alice pulled her back up the stairs and into her room, flinging open the closet. "Are you a nun?" She asked, "My mom wears more revealing clothes than this." She said, flipping through the shirts.

"I went to private school." Bella replied. "Uniforms."

"That must have been hell." Alice pulled out a shirt and held it up to Bella, "This should be okay, but we really need to go shopping. Well, put it on."

Bella waited for Alice to leave, as soon as the shirt was on, she realized what it was. Her mother had given it to her for her birthday. This was the first time she had worn it. "Thanks mom." She sighed, and then made her way back down stairs. There were many people already in the living room, and she could smell the finished pizzas coming from the kitchen.

"Bella, you look nice." Rose said, setting a steaming pizza on the table in the middle of the room.

"Thanks, Alice helped."

"Of course." Rose rolled her eyes. "You'll get used to her. She really isn't that bad. You just have to learn to control her."

"Control her? You make it sound like she's a dog." Bella laughed.

"Well, she can be quite the bitch." Rose replied quietly as Alice came out of the kitchen with another pizza.

"Told you it would work." Alice said taking pride in the fact that she had, once again, created the perfect outfit.

"Thanks Alice." As the words slipped out, she noticed the door open, and Edward Cullen walked in the room, he made it all the way to Emmet, who was standing in the corner with boy Alice pointed out to be Jasper, before he turned to look at her.

They locked eyes for just a moment. Before Bella pulled away. She tried to get her mind off of him, by introducing herself to the other party guests. She was doing pretty well. At about ten o'clock, she decided it was time for some air. She stepped out the back door, leaving the guests and heading back onto the path in the forest.

She chose not to run this time, but instead walked carefully along the path, enjoying the fact that it was still fairly warm.

She came to a clearing, and the moon light it up brightly. Laying down on the grass, she could see the stars. She drifted into a light sleep, but she did not have nightmares, instead she had pleasant dreams, visited by the new people she had just met. The most frequent visitor of all being Edward.

She awoke when her phone rang. "Hello?" She answered, still tired.

"Hey Bella!" It was Max, "You asked me to call you when I woke up."

"Yeah, thanks," She checked the time. "Shit! Umm, Max. I have to go, I think I'm in trouble."

"What's wrong?"

"Oh, I just fell asleep in the woods, and now it's 2am. And Charlie doesn't know where I am."

"Why are you out in the woods so late, and by yourself?" He sounded really worried.

"It's just the woods behind my house. I'm fine. I can be back there in five minutes." She reassured him.

"Okay Bella, I have to go, my mom is calling me. Call me later okay?"

"Okay, Love you."

"I love you too." And with that they hung up.

"What are you doing out here?" A voice asked from behind her.

She spun around to face Edward. "Um, I fell asleep. Is Charlie mad?"

"I don't think so." Edward said laying down to look at the stars.

"Why are you here?" Bella asked, laying down, a few feet away from him.

"I saw you leave. I had to make sure you were okay. You were gone for almost four hours. It took forever to find you."

"My personal super hero, coming to the rescue." Bella giggled.

"I'm not a super hero. I'm more like a bad guy." He said seriously.

Bella turned to face him. "I don't believe you." She said, scooting a little closer.

"So who was on the phone?" Edward asked, he must have heard the whole conversation.

"My friend Max, in London."

"Why did you move here?

"Um, my parents died." he didn't expect her to go on, but she did. "They were in a car accident, two weeks ago."

"I'm sorry." Edward didn't know what else to say.

"Yeah. They were out late. I thought I heard them come home, so I was shocked when the police showed up at the door. It was either move in with my grandparents or move in with Charlie."

"I think you made a good choice." Edward said. Bella started crying. Edward put one arm around her, and pulled her closer.

"I'm sorry, it;s just been a long two weeks."

"I understand." Edward said, "When I lost my parents, I was a complete wreck. But remember, "When all is lost, everything you need is right in front of you." My mom used to tell me that."

"You lost your parents? I didn't know."

"Yeah, Alice, Emmet and I are adopted."

"Wait, you're all siblings? You look nothing alike."

"No, we aren't really siblings."

"Oh." Bella said, feeling dumb.

"And Rose and Jasper live with us too. They're cousins."

"Wow, your family is confusing." Bella was still trying to figure out who was related to who.

"Yeah, well everyone thought you were dating your uncle." Bella couldn't help but to laugh at this.

"Yeah that was pretty funny." They sat in silence, looking at the stars, and Bella felt herself drifting back to sleep. "My super hero." She said again, making sure Edward was still with her.

"No, not a super hero. Don't trick yourself." Edward was trying to warn her to stay away from him, and trying to convince himself to stay away from her. But she was too beautiful, and too kind. She was perfect.

**A/N Thank you all so much for reveiwing. I have chapter three finished, and I will try to put it on later today. Chapter four is also almost done, hopefully up sometime this weekend!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Thanks for all the reviews! Here is chapter three. Hope you like it.  
I am looking for a few people that could help me, as the story gets more complicated, just people I could run my ideas across as they come.  
If you're interested, my email address is on my profile. **

When Bella woke up, she was surprised to see that she was in her bed. She could hear the TV on downstairs. She sat in her bed trying to remember everything from the night before. Had she really fallen asleep in Edward's arms? She had never done such a thing before. She walked down the stairs, not caring what she looked like.

Charlie was sitting on the couch watching a game show. "Good morning. You had a long night. Imagine my surprise when I open the door and 3 AM to see Edward Cullen carrying you."

"Edward brought me home?" She asked.

"Yeah, I didn't know you were gone. Alice told me she saw you go up to bed."

"Yeah, I had gone up, but then I went for a walk. I fell asleep, and Edward found me."

"I have to go to work today, are you going to be okay by yourself?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine." Bella grabbed a piece of toast and went back to her room.

"He is a super hero." She said to herself when she got in her room.

She turned on her computer, but she had no new messages. She went on her old schools website to check on the sports teams. The time seemed to be passing in slow motion. 'What do American teenagers do for fun?' She asked herself.

She looked outside her bedroom window. She could see the town. It didn't seem to be too far. She had already heard Charlie leave, so she decided to walk.

She walked into town, and found a very small clothing store. Alice's comments on her clothing choices got her brain thinking up new outfits to wear. She looked around at shirts mostly, but also a few pairs of jeans. When she left the store she had one new pair of jeans, complete with holes and all, and three new tops, all of them colourful, and one of them slightly revealing. She looked at them one by one, wondering if Alice would approve.

She could only spend so much time shopping, she had never liked it very much. She was into more active things, such as rock climbing, white water rafting, and of course, running. Basically anything that was high risk was good for her.

She began the walk back to her house, taking her time. Now that she took the time to look around, Forks was actually looking very nice. She missed the busyness of London, but the small town feel was starting to grow on her. She loved the fact that everyone seemed to know each other, and even though they didn't know her, they were still friendly. She passed two old women talking on the bench when they saw her, she heard on of them mention her brother's name. News sure did travel fast around here. She smiled politely at them and they nodded hello. Maybe they were friends of her grandmother. She realized that she had not seen her grandparents since the day the all came to Forks after the funeral. She took a left instead of a right at the next corner, and headed to her grandparent's house.

"Isabella!" Her grandmother called, opening the door before she had made it up the driveway. Emily had been her mom's mother, and they looked very much alike. Her grandmother didn't look very old, she looked much younger than she really was.

"Hi grammy." Bella said, giving her grandmother a hug. She was a fairly short woman, with slightly graying hair. She had a very thick accent, even more than Bella's. She had been living in America since before Bella was born, but they were still very close.

Her grandmother led her into the parlor, explaining that her grandfather had taken advantage of the unusually good November weather to golf with some friends. "He has to get all his golfing done before the snow starts to fall." she had explained. Bella stayed just long enough to have a cup of tea and make small talk. As she left, she promised to stop by more often, it was only about a fifteen minute walk from her house.

The next few days seemed to go on as normal. Charlie spent most of his time working or at the gym working out, giving Bella plenty of alone time. The girls at school started talking to her a little more, she even had a group to eat lunch with, releasing Charlie of the job. One thing however was keeping Bella down. She had not spoken to Edward since the night of the party.

They sat next to each other in both History and Science, but he seemed to be avoiding her. Every time she would try to ask him a question, he would give her a short answer, and go back to what he was doing. She thought they had gotten along fine, but he was acting like he was mad at her. A week went by, Bella had been constantly trying to get Edward's attention. She decided, that if he didn't want to talk to her, she wasn't going to waste her time.

The next Monday morning, Edward came up to Bella as soon as she sat down in History. "Hey Bella." He said, sitting next to her.

"Hi?" She said, giving him a questioning look.

He continued talking, mostly making small talk, before she interrupted him. "Edward! What do you want?" She demanded, starting to get angry.

"I just wanted to talk." He replied innocently.

"I was trying to talk to you all last week!" The bell rang and she turned her head to face her papers.

"I needed to think." He said, scooting closer to her.

"What would you need to think about for that long?" She was whispering now, so the teacher wouldn't hear her.

"You." He simply stated.

She blushed, but hid it. "Why?"

"I told you, I'm not a super hero, but you make me want to be." She looked at him confused. "When I'm with you, I don't want to be the bad guy anymore."

Bella needed time to think. This was all going to fast, she had barely known him for a week. She didn't talk to him for the rest of the day. She needed to find out more about this Edward Cullen.

As soon as Charlie got home, Bella had begun thinking up ways she could casually bring up Edward, in order to find out a little more about him. She began by talking about the other members of his family, Alice and Emmet first. Then slowly started asking more and more questions about Edward. "What's he like?" She finally asked.

Charlie looked at her suspiciously. "Bella, Edward really isn't that great of a guy. He's a good friend, but I don't want you to get hurt."

"What did he do that was so bad?" She desperately wanted to know.

"Bella, he's hurt a lot of people. His siblings, his parents, girls. He's tried changing, but it never lasts. He's been one of my best friends since we were young. I know him really well. I just don't want you getting mixed up in the things he's involved in."

Bella wasn't quite understanding, "Does he do drugs?" She asked Charlie.

"I really shouldn't be talking about him." Charlie turned to leave th kitchen.

"Charlie please!" Bella begged. "Edward was so nice to me the night of the party, and I really like him. He told me he isn't a good guy, but I need to know why." She let a tear slip, mostly on purpose.

Charlie thought for a moment. She was right. If she really did like him, she deserved to know some things, just enough to get her to forget about him that way. He thought back to the beginning of last summer. They knew each other long before high school, meeting through Emmet who was in between their ages. That summer had started fairly normal, but he remembered the day he and Emmet had found Edward passed out on the couch.

"I had just finished my Junior year, Edward had just finished his Freshman year and Emmet had just finished his Sophomore year. We were like the three stooges, always together, always hanging out. Emmet had spent the night at my house, and in the morning we went to pick up Edward, we found him passed out on the front porch. We got him in my car and took him back to my place. He was completely drunk. He had been invited to a party. He had also been given some ecstasy. As soon as we were able to, we tried to talk some sense into him, but nothing we said had any affect on him. He's gone through good times and bad since then, but he still drinks, and he still does drugs. And girls, he's been with so many. I don't want you to become just one more girl he's with."

As soon as Charlie was finished, she knew why Edward was so bad. She knew his reasoning too. She also could feel herself falling in love with him.

She went up to her room, and laid down on her bed. Her radio was playing a song, but it was very quiet. She couldn't make out the words, but she knew the song perfectly. She hummed it to herself softly and thought about Edward, letting her thoughts drift to her friends back in London, and then to her new friends in Forks, landing back on Edward. And that's where they stayed.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: I have way too much fun writing this story! I hope you guys like reading it.  
Chapter five is being written, and should be up Friday night or Saturday afternoon**

The next day Bella walked up to Edward, and grabbed his arm, pulling him down the hallway with her. "Charlie told me." She said, when they were out of earshot of the others.

"He did?" Edward asked, eyes getting wide.

"Yeah. I begged him."

Edward was pleased that she was curious about him, but was also a little bit worried about what exactly Charlie had told her. "And?" He asked her, wanting to know her reaction.

"And I don't care. Edward, you were so nice to me on my first day here, a lot nicer than most other people."

"You don't care, at all?" He asked, realizing Charlie must not have told her everything.

"Nope, none of it matters." She smiled up at him, and held out her hand, waiting for his. He sighed. He liked Bella, a lot. Maybe too much. Maybe that was his problem, he liked her too much. And he couldn't mess this up.

He took her hand, and walked with her to their first class. They sat closer than usual, ignoring the stares from the students around them. He knew they would be talking about them for the rest of the day, and for the first time, he didn't care what anyone (except Bella) thought of him.

At lunch, they sat together, along with the rest of his family. Emmet kept glancing over at Edward disapprovingly, but none of the others noticed, the girls were too far into their conversation about a shopping trip Alice had planned for the next weekend, her and Rose were trying to convince Bella that it would be fun. Jasper was busy studying for a test in his next hour, that he had been previously too preoccupied to study for.

The other students in the lunchroom each took turns looking over at what they called "The Cullen Clan," many of them noticing how well Bella seemed to fit in with them. The boys were jealous of Edward, and a few already had plans for breaking them. The girls were still shocked at the fact that Edward had a girlfriend. The girls had been trying to get to him since the beginning of last school year, he had yet to go out with any of them. And for many of the girls, this curiosity was also accompanied with jealousy of Bella.

As they left the lunchroom, Edward invited Bella out for dinner, promising to pick her up at eight o'clock. Giving her a small peck on the cheek, he walked off to his next class, leaving her to go to hers. The rest of her school day was spent trying to figure out what to wear, and daydreaming about what it would be like. She went home after to school to try on all her clothes.

Edward went home to find Emmet sitting on the couch, apparently waiting for him.

"Hey Em." He said, hoping to be able to sneak off to his room.

"She doesn't know does she?" Emmet asked without taking his eyes off the TV.

"No, Charlie didn't tell her." He started up the stairs.

"Are you going to tell her?"

"When she needs to know." He went up and changed his clothes. He grabbed a small gift bag from the chair by his door, and went back downstairs. "Mom?" He called, looking into the kitchen for his mother, Esme. She poked her head up from the oven.

"Hi Edward." She said, coming over to hug him. "Are you going to have dinner here tonight?"

"No, I'm going to see Jeremy." His mother smiled at this.

"Okay," she said, noticing the bag, "What's that?"

"Just a little thing, nothing much."

She peaked in anyways. "That's adorable." She said, adding "Say hi to Rachel for me!" as he walked out the back door.

Edward drove the fifteen minutes to Rachel's house, listening to the radio to distract him. It had been a while since he was there, and he was very excited. As soon as he pulled up, he couldn't help but to smile. He walked up to the small one story house and opened the door, without bothering to knock. There was an old woman sitting at the table, she appeared to be asleep. He walked right past her, and to the back of the house, to Rachel's bedroom. He could hear them inside, before he got to the door. He opened it to face the two smiling faces in front of him.

Rachel looked down to the baby in her arms, "Daddy's here!" she said to the child, before handing him over.

Edward took the child in his arms. "You're getting big." He was still amazed that this child was his. "How are you Rachel?" He said to the girl, who had sat back down in the chair.

"I'm doing pretty good. Can't wait for a break though." She winked at him.

She was a very beautiful girl. A year older than Edward, in her brother's grade. She lived and went to school in the next time. He had never been in love with her, and they never dated, just hooked up at parties when he was a freshman.

"Well, I guess I'll leave." Rachel said, looking at the clock. "I should be back at six. Is that okay?"

Edward nodded his head, secretly wishing that she would be late, allowing him to spend more time with his son.

As soon as Rachel left, Edward sat the almost one year old down. They stared at each other for more than a minute, before the child spoke first, "Dada." he said.

"Yes, I'm Dada." Edward took the present from behind his back, putting it in front of the child, whose eyes got wide. "Open it." He said, as the child just stared at it. Edward helped him, by taking the stuffed animal out of the bag. The boy grabbed the stuffed animal, a zebra with a coat on, and hugged it tight. "I hoped you would like it." Edward looked at the clock. They only had about two hours together. He took his son in his arms, and carried him over to the rocking chair, grabbing a book, he knew to be Jeremy's favorite. He read it softly in Jeremy's ear, when he was finished, he looked up to his son's face. He had fallen asleep. Edward spent the rest of the time with his son, holding him, rocking back and forth in the rocking chair. Rachel returned too soon.

"How was it?" Esme asked, when Edward got home.

"Good. Jeremy slept most of the time though." Edward smiled just thinking about it.

"You could always bring him over here you know." Esme said, her eyes pleading. She had only met Jeremy a few times, and felt that her duties as a grandmother, were not being fulfilled.

"Yeah, I will. I promise." He made a mental note to ask Rachel when her and Jeremy could come over next. "I have to get ready now." He said, as he saw it was almost seven.

"Ready for what?" Esme asked, as Alice walked into the kitchen.

"Edward has a date," Alice stated simply, "With Charlie's niece."

The last part of the answer forced Esme to give Edward a weird look. He explained, "Bella, the new girl at school, she's Charlie's niece, she's in my grade."

"I didn't know Charlie had any siblings, he never spoke about them to me." Esme said, wanting Edward to continue.

"His sister lived in London. She died recently, so her daughter came to live with Charlie." Edward ran upstairs to shower, and get dressed, again. He became nervous as he walked down the stairs, mentally preparing himself for his first real date.

Bella was confident that her clothes would be suitable for dinner just about anywhere. She was wearing a pair of light jeans, and a light blue shirt with a white tank top underneath. Her hair was curling around her shoulders, as always, but she was debating putting it up or not. She decided not to, as the doorbell rang, mainly for the sake of time. She ran downstairs as fast as she could.

Charlie had beat her to the door. He looked at Edward. Sure they were friends, but Charlie didn't want him dating his niece. He figured Bella was old enough that he could trust her, it was Edward he didn't trust.

"Bye Charlie." Bella said, joining Edward outside.

"Take care of her, Edward." Charlie said, a hint of warning in his voice. Edward knew what was implied. Edward was not to do anything that would get Bella in trouble.

"I will Charlie, I promise." Edward replied, hoping Bella couldn't sense the tension in the air. Luckily she seemed not to notice, as she promised Charlie she would be home by curfew. The two walked to Edward's car, and got in. he refused to say were they were going, and insisted that she close her eyes. She complied.

They drove for over half an hour, before Edward stopped the car. "Open." he said to Bella. He was pleased when she gasped. Before her was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen. They were on a cliff, overlooking the ocean.

"It's beautiful." Bella said, at loss for more words. Edward reached behind him, pulling out a picnic basket. He got out of the car. He reached up and put a blanket on top of his car. "We're eating on your roof?" Bella asked, a little confused. Edward said nothing, but helped Bella climb up. He followed.

Bella looked out over the cliff again, she could now see the ocean fully, the stars were reflecting on the water.

"You can't see the stars from in the car." Edward explained, getting out the food.

They sat on the roof of his car, eating and taking turns asking questions. Edward had pulled out another blanket, and some hot coco. As Bella took her first sip, something cold landed on her nose. She brushed it off and then looked up into the sky. It had started snowing. Edward leaned in, and kissed her on the lips. She kept her eyes open, wanting to remember every detail of the moment.

"I love you Bella." Edward said, as he pulled away.

"I love you too." Bella replied.

The date had been short, just a quick dinner before the snow had started, but it was perfect. Bella had almost everything she ever wanted. And this was good for now.

**Does anyone hate me? Anyone have any suggestions?**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Here is Chapter five. Thank you for all your reviews!  
I write this story for you guys, so tell me if you really want something to happen. The idea in my head is only an outline, so I'll try to fit it in.**

The next day, Edward picked Bella up for school. She came out very flustered. She opened the car door, and plopped herself next to him, without saying anything.

"Something wrong?" He asked.

"Yes." She didn't continue.

"What?" He asked as he backed out the driveway.

"Nothing." Bella shrugged it off and put on her best smile.

Charlie was still mad at her, even after sleeping on it. She had told him she was going out with some friends the night before, knowing he would not let her go out with Edward. Charlie had agreed, happy that she had made friends so quickly. Imagine his surprise when Edward's car pulled up, and Bella, kissing him on the cheek first got out. Charlie waited until Bella got in, and then just stared at her.

"You lied." he finally said.

"Yes, but only because I knew you would say no."

"You were right. Edward isn't right for you." Charlie didn't want to see her get hurt, the words he spoke came straight from his heart.

Bella found herself getting mad. "How do you know whats right for me. You aren't my dad!" She raised her voice, but she did not scream.

"I know that Bella, I don't know you very well. But I know Edward. And it's my job to watch after you. If you don't like it, you can live with your grandparents."

Bella regretted what she said, before he had even replied. "I'm sorry Charlie." She was close to tears.

She was about to continue, but he interrupted her, "Bella, I know it's hard losing your parents. I went through it when I was little. But you can't shut out the people that care about you."

She walked over and hugged him. "I guess it's still hitting me, I can't believe they're gone."

He hated to see her cry, so he didn't bring up Edward again.

In the morning, Charlie saw Edward's car pull into the driveway. Bella came running down the stairs. "Bye Charlie!" She called, grabbing her shoes.

"Bella! Remember what I said, I don't want you seeing him." He expected her to break it off with him during the day.

This got her angry.

Edward and Bella spent the next two weeks holding hands, not paying attention to the world around them. Edward seemed to be very smart, always rushing through the assignments, and Bella had done everything already, so they were simple for her, giving them plenty of time to sit and look at each other.

Charlie had given up on lecturing Bella, but still made it clear that he didn't approve. He also didn't let Edward in the house.

Every once in a while, Bella would find herself wondering what she did to deserve so a wonderful relationship. Edward seemed perfect, and all the stares she was getting, mainly from their families, were confusing her. She saw nothing wrong with him, she spent all the time imaginable with him, so she would know if he was still doing everything she had been warned about.

Sunday night, Edward called Bella. "Hey, I can't pick you up in the morning, there's something I have to do."

"Okay?" Bella replied. Edward sounded worried. Suddenly everything she had been told about Edward came to mind. "What's going on?" She wanted to know.

"On, nothing, I'm just not going to school. I have to go, I'll call you tomorrow." Edward hung up.

All the bad things went through her head. Was Edward skipping school to drink? Get high? Be with another girl? She tried to calm herself down, she was getting worked up over what was probably nothing. But as she went to bed that night, she couldn't help but wonder what was going on. If only she knew what was going on with Edward.

Edward had received the call on Sunday afternoon. Rachel's sister was in the hospital in New York. She was going to see her and needed someone to take care of Jeremy.

"Rachel, I don't know if I can do that." Edward still doubted his skills as a parent.

"Edward, you'll do fine. My grandma offered to watch him, but you know how she is." Her grandmother had Alzheimer's and would probably forget that Jeremy was even there.

"I'll ask my mom, she would have to watch him while I was at school."

His mother was thrilled at the thought of Jeremy coming to stay with them, but told him that she couldn't watch him the next day, but would love to the other days. He figured he could miss a day of school, and would love to spend an entire day with his son.

"Okay, Rachel. I'll come pick him up."

"Great Edward. I only plan on being gone for three days. I'll get his stuff ready and see you in... an hour?" She asked.

"Yeah, see you then." Edward put down the phone and began cleaning his room. He knew Jeremy would be sleeping in his room, so he wanted it to be safe. As he heard the rest of his family coming home, he began to get anxious. They had all met Jeremy, but had never spent much time with him. They also thought he had to tell Bella, the last thing he needed was one of them to tell her,

He picked up his son, and filled the truck of his car with all the stuff he would need. When he returned to his house, his family, with the exception of Esme, were surprised to see Jeremy there. Emmet, from the couch, was staring at them as they walked in.

Alice and Rose came in the room. "Jeremy!" Alice screamed. She ran over to see him. "Edward, why didn't you tell us he was coming over?"

"Esme knew." He replied, letting his sister take his son out of his arms.

"Oh, Jeremy, you're getting so big!" She set him down on the carpet so she and Rose could play with him. Jasper came from upstairs and sat down next to Alice. Esme and Carlisle came in from the kitchen, they seemed equally as happy to see Jeremy. The only one who didn't seem happy with it, was Emmet. He, being Charlie's best friend wanted Edward to be honest with Bella.

The family sat in the living room together, just talking and playing with Jeremy. At about eight o'clock, Jeremy's head started to nod forward, "I should get him to bed." Edward said, reaching out to grab his son.

"Where is he sleeping?" Esme wanted to know. She had never had a baby in the house, and it was obvious that she wished he would ask her to watch him for the night.

"He's going to be in my room." Edward said, trying to ignore the disappointment on her face.

That night, Edward barely slept. It was the first time he had ever been with his son overnight, and he kept getting up to check on him. Edward didn't know, but Esme would also come in to see how they were doing.

Jeremy slept through most of the night, but woke up crying early in the morning. Edward jumped out of bed, and held Jeremy. He tried everything, changing him, feeding him, and playing with him, but Jeremy kept crying. It was only five, and Edward was worried that his family members would wake up, so he did the only thing he could think of.

He went to his car, and put Jeremy in his car seat. They began driving around. After a few minutes, Jeremy quieted down. Edward looked at him. He was looking out the window watching the trees go by. It was completely silent in the car, it seemed that Jeremy only needed some time to calm down.

Jeremy and Edward spent the day driving around, getting out of the car every once in a while to play in the snow. They went for lunch at a diner outside of town, Jeremy drinking a bottle, and a few mashed potatoes. They went home around three, and played with Jeremy's toys.

When the others got home from school, Jeremy had just fallen asleep. Emmet came up to Edward, "We need to talk." he said.

Edward was worried that he had said something to Bella, but sat down to listen to him.

"Edward," Emmet didn't seem to know what he wanted to say, "When are you going to tell Bella, you've been going out for almost three weeks."

"I don't want her to know yet." Edward had already made this clear.

"Christmas is in two weeks, what are you going to tell her? "I have to leave dinner at your house, to go be with the son I never told you about?""

"I don't know Emmet."

"Edward, Charlie is in charge of Bella. And I am friends with Charlie, meaning I care about Bella. I don't want to see her get hurt."

Edward couldn't believe this, "Why do you think I'm going to hurt Bella? I haven't gotten into any trouble since she moved here. I'm trying really hard."

Esme had been listening from the doorway, "I know that you are trying. But Edward, don't keep her in the dark." With that she walked away. That night, Edward knew what he had to do.

Bella had been lonely at school with Edward gone, and she looked forward to seeing him again. When he pulled up in the driveway, she jumped up and ran to the car. Edward looked exhausted, Bella didn't ask what was wrong, mainly out of fear of what he would say.

Edward had been up all night, thinking of ways to tell Bella. He had finally decided what he was going to do. "Do you want to come over tonight?" he asked her.

Bella had never been to Edward's house, "Of course."

Edward smiled at her. His plan was to just introduce Bella to Jeremy. Hopefully she would understand.

Edward spent the whole thinking of all the ways she could react. He was trying to prepare himself for the worst. He knew it was possible that Bella would get mad, and break up with him, but he desperately hoped that she wouldn't.

At lunch, he stopped Emmet, before he entered the lunchroom. "I just wanted you to know that I'm telling Bella after school today."

"Good." He turned around to go in the lunchroom, "and Edward, It's been nice having you back."

Edward smiled, so Emmet had noticed he had been trying. He hadn't gotten high since before the party at Bella's house. And it had been even longer since he had drank.

Bella was nervous as they pulled up to Edward's house. She had heard so many wonderful things about his mother, and was anxious to meet her.

They walked into the large house, and Edward called out for Esme, "Mom?"

"I'm in the kitchen." She called back, she still had no idea that Bella was there.

Edward quickly brought Bella into the kitchen. His mother was standing at the sink, a bottle in her hand. "This is Bella."

She turned around surprised. "Hello Bella, I'm Esme."

She walked over to the table where Jeremy was sitting in his high chair.

"Edward!" Bella said, walking over to see the baby, "You didn't tell me you had a little brother."

Edward walked over to look at his son. "I don't." he said to Bella, who looked at him curiously.

"Dada!" Jeremy said, reaching out for Edward.

Bella's smiled dropped, and she looked at Edward, looking for answers.

**A/N: OHHH Cliff Hanger! Sorry! I'll update as soon as I can, Chapter six is about half way done, but it's missing something, and I need an idea. Help me?**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Sorry to keep you waiting, I had some computer problems. This chapter is short, but the next one is longer.**

**Enjoy!**

Esme had left the room to let them talk. They were sitting at the table, Jeremy in between them.

"So...he's your son?" Bella asked.

Edward nodded his head, "He's almost one." He said.

Bella looked at the baby, she seemed to be studying him. "He has your eyes. Who's his mom?" She asked, although she dreaded the answer.

"Her name is Rachel. I met her at a party when I was a freshman. We spent one night together." Edward was determined to be honest with her, no matter what she thought of him. She hadn't left yet, he saw that as a good sign.

"You never dated?"

"No."

Bella then realized that Edward couldn't keep a secret this big to him and his mom. "Does Charlie know?"

"Yes, and so does the rest of my family, but no one else at school knows." Edward explained. Bella closed her eyes. "Are you mad?"

"No, I'm not mad." Bella was telling the truth, she was not mad at Edward, she was however mad at Charlie. He had warned her that Edward was into drugs and alcohol, why would he lie about that? "So this is what you did that was bad."

"Yeah. You already know everything else."

Bella looked up, had Charlie told her the truth? "Everything else?" She asked.

"Charlie told you, right?" Edward was starting to get confused himself. "Maybe I should just tell you." Bella nodded her head, obviously wanting to know everything about Edward. "I met Rachel at a party. When school ended, she called to tell me she was pregnant. I didn't know what to do, I didn't tell anyone. I was invited to a party. I went and I drank, and I got high. I was able to forget everything that was going on. Our brothers found me the next morning. When I woke up, I told them everything. Telling my mom was the hardest." He sighed, remembering how hard it had been to tell everyone. "They were disappointed in me, obviously, but I hated myself. So I kept taking drugs, and drinking."

"And now?" Bella asked.

"I wish I could say that I stopped right away. But I didn't. When Jeremy was born, I tried...but I felt so bad about myself. Bella, I wasn't able to stop drinking, until I met you."

She blushed at this. "You haven't done drugs either?"

"Not since you got here. You make me so happy, I don't need them anymore." He reached out and took her hand. She seemed to be taking it all really well. She just sat there and smiled at him.

"I love you Edward!" She finally said.

He smiled, "I love you too."

"So... Can I meet Rachel?"

Edward had not expected this, he never even thought of the possibility. "Um, I don't know. She's not in town right now, but maybe when she gets back."

Bella seemed content with this answer. She reached over and took Jeremy out of his chair. Edward watched as she sat and played peek a boo with him. He had never expected this. It isn't really something in life you plan.

Bella came over the next day after school too. She enjoyed spending time with Jeremy, almost as much as being with Edward. She was still trying to get used to the fact that he really was Edward's son, but the more time she spent with them, the more she could tell. They sort of looked a like, and they both looked at her with the same eyes.

She was glad that he told her. She let Charlie know that she was now in the loop, and he felt better about them being together. He trusted Bella enough to let her make her own decisions.

The last night of Jeremy's stay at the Cullen's house, Bella had come over for dinner. Rachel had called to say she was on her way.

"I can take you home." Edward offered to Bella.

"No, I want to meet her."

"Now?" Edward asked. He wasn't sure Bella could handle that. No, he wasn't sure he could handle that.

"Yes, now!" Bella seemed excited. "She can't be that bad, look at her son."

Rachel arrived right on time, the family had left, they still felt weird around Rachel sometimes.

"I'm Bella." She introduced herself as soon as Rachel had walked in the door.

"Oh! You must be Edward's girlfriend! It's nice to meet you." Rachel hugged her. "I hear that you get along really well with Jeremy."

"Yes, he's amazing, so cute." They both looked over to Edward, who was holding Jeremy.

"Hey Rach." He said, handing Jeremy over.

"How was he?" Rachel asked, sounding a little worried.

"He was great, the first morning was a little rough, but after that it was good."

"I'm glad. He needs more time with you."

Bella and Rachel seemed to be getting along fine, neither one of them gave hint that they felt awkward. Edward on the other hand, was on the edge of his seat. He felt a tension in the air, but he was the only one. The thought of Bella and Rachel being friends both delighted him, and frightened him. On one hand, he wanted them to get along, wanted them to be able to be friends. But he also didn't want Rachel telling Bella about all the stuff he had done. It wasn't like he didn't want her to know, he just wanted to be the one to tell her, when he was ready.

Rachel and Bella decided to go out for dinner, Edward of course went with them. They made small talk mostly, talking about how life was in London, compared to here. Every once and a while, Edward would look into Bella's eyes, and see something he did not recognize. He spent most of their time out together, trying to figure out what it was, while listening to the conversation in case they tried to include him.

When they parted ways, Jeremy going home with Rachel, Edward started to drive Bella home, still wondering what he had seen in her eyes.

"She's nice." Bella said, after a long silence.

"Yeah, I'm glad you like her." He looked at Bella, she had the same look as before. It seemed to rip at Edward's heart, making him feel guilty even though he did not know how she felt.

"Were you high, when...you know. You and her...?" Bella wanted to know.

"Yes," Edward relied truthfully.

"If you had another chance would you do it again?" Bella looked at him, waiting foe the answer.

He sighed, not sure what was about to come out of his mouth, "Yes." He finally said.

Bella just nodded her head, she seemed to understand. Edward kissed her goodnight, before she got out of the car. He watched her walk up to the house, and turn around to look at him before going in. She gave him a weak smile, but in the porch light, he could see the same thing. This time, he recognized what it was. Jealousy.

Bella walked in her house, and found Charlie asleep on the couch. He smelled of alcohol, but Bella didn't mind, she was used to it by now. She walked upstairs to her room, she needed some thinking time.

Edward didn't want Bella to be jealous of Rachel. He didn't love Rachel. He loved Bella.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Two chapters were added, this is _chapter seven_****, please make sure you read chapter six first.**

**This chapter took a lot of work to write, I hope you enjoy it!**

Christmas had come and gone, so had Jeremy's first birthday. Edward's life seemed to be going fairly normal, at least for him. He was happy with his life, except for one thing. He seemed to be getting farther and farther from Bella. He would call her to hang out, and she would make up an excuse. At first, it didn't bother him, he figured she just needed time to get used to the fact he was a dad. But as Valentine's Day got closer, he wondered if they would spend it together or apart.

"Hey Bella." He had gotten her answering machine again, "Uh, just wanted to know what you wanted to do for Valentine's Day. So call me later I guess."

He sat in his room, waiting for her to call. Eventually, boredom overtook him, and he began to clean his closet. He pulled out a box, that had been hidden in the back. He opened it, not remembering what it contained. Inside he saw relics of his past. A few half full bottles of liquor, a few bottles of pills, and a small bag of cocaine. He sighed, he thought he had gotten rid of it all. Instead of pulling it out and throwing it away, he put the lid on, and slid it back into the closet.

His phone rang, and he jumped up to get it. "Hello?"

"Hey Edward." It was Bella, she didn't seem to be herself.

"Hi Bella, how are you?"

"I'm okay...Edward, I can't spend Valentine's Day with you. Since it's a long weekend, Charlie got off work, and my Grandparents in England are flying us in." Edward's heart sank at her words. He was speechless. "Edward?"

"Yeah, I'm here. When do you leave?"

"That's the thing, we leave on Wednesday." Wednesday? That meant she would be gone for at least a week.

"When do you come back?"

"The 20th, it was the only time Charlie could get off work." Edward looked at his calendar, Wednesday was the 5th, Bella would be gone for 15 days. "I'm sorry Edward. I'll see you at school tomorrow." With that she hung up.

"Yeah." He said, as he closed his phone. He found himself looking to his closet, wanting to pull out the box again, but he resisted. He had given that up. Instead he walked down to the kitchen. There was half a chocolate cake sitting on the counter. "Chocolate...A recovering addict's best friend," he thought to himself, taking a big piece.

As soon as Bella hung up with Edward she called Max, "I'm coming on Wednesday!" She screamed as soon as he answered.

"Really? I'm going to have to tell Everyone, we can throw you a big party as soon as you get here, we don't have school on Thursday or Friday."

They talked on the phone for almost an hour, making plans, talking about the party they would throw.

As soon as all the plans had been mad, she ran to tell Charlie. He joking asked if her was invited.

"Sorry, but it's really not cool to bring your guardians to a party." He nodded his head, and smiled, he understood perfectly.

Bella was so excited, she went upstairs and began to pack her clothes.

The next day at school she couldn't stop smiling, or talking about her upcoming trip, she didn't even notice how sad Edward's eyes looked.

On Wednesday, Edward went to school, knowing Bella would not be there. He didn't talk to anyone throughout the day, even at lunch time, his family watched him with concern. He didn't go home after school, instead he walked to the meadow where he and Bella talked, the night of the party, the place he first found himself falling in love with her. He walked around, ruining the perfectly smooth surface of the snow.

When his nose got so cold, it was almost frozen, he decided it was time to return home. He walked in, to find the house empty. He sat on the couch, and decided to call Rachel. He got here machine. "Hey Rach, just wanted to know if I could come pick up Jeremy. Call me later, bye." He hung up, and wandered around his house looking for something to do. Going up to his room, his mind wandered back to the box in his closet. "Surely one drink wouldn't hurt," he said out loud trying to convince himself.

He pulled out the box and looked at it. "Won't hurt anything, no one will know." He said out loud. As he took out a bottle, he secretly hoped that someone would come through the door and stop him, her wanted that so badly, that he took the box and walked down to the living room. Any second, someone would come through the door and stop him. He took a sip. One turned into two, which quickly turned into three. And then the bottle was empty. He looked at the door, waiting for someone, anyone. He knew he should have stopped there, but he didn't. He grabbed another bottle, not even sure what it was, and downed it as quickly as possible. He stood up, but was starting to get dizzy, so he sat back down.

He grabbed a bottle of pills, looking for relief of the headache that was starting to build, or possibly more for the heartache he was feeling. Tears were coming out of his eyes as he downed a few pills, but he was unable to control them. He lay back on the couch, and let himself fall into a deep sleep.

Alice was the first on in. The family had gone out to dinner, but she needed to finish her report that was due the next day. "Hey Edward." she called, seeing him on the couch. She began to go up the stairs when she saw the liquor bottle sitting next to him, empty. "Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit!" She screamed, not caring that her parents were just outside. She ran back down to Edward. "Wake up!" She said to him, "Mom is about to come in. Wake up." She then saw the bottle of pills sitting on the table. "Edward!" She screamed at the top of her lungs, out of pure anger. She had thought he was done with this stage of his life.

Her parents came rushing in, obviously they had heard her screaming. "Edward!" Her mother screamed.

Alice had tears running down her face. Memories of last time she found him like this came back to her. "Daddy!" She said, looking at her dad. "Help him."

Alice didn't like to admit it, but she considered Edward her best friend. Both of them were adopted at the same time, and they became friends immediately. They had been through so much together.

Carlisle came over to the couch quickly and checked Edward's pulse, "His pulse is slow, we have to get him to the hospital."

Emmet and Carlisle carried Edward to the car, and put him in the backseat, with Carlisle driving, Esme went with them. Emmet, Alice, Rosalie and Jasper climbed into Emmet's car. They drove to the hospital quickly. Everything seemed to be going in slow motion, nothing was happening fast enough. The family sat in the waiting room, wanting desperately to hear news of Edward.

Edward woke up to an annoying beeping noise. There was also a pounding in his head. He felt a hand tighten around his own. When he opened his eyes, he saw his mother sitting in a chair next to him, she was asleep. He remembered what he had done, and immediately felt terrible. "Mom." He whispered.

She jumped up, she had only been half asleep. "Edward..." She squeezed his hand a little more. "Edward, what did you do?"

He shook his head, unable to reply. He felt it in his stomach, they had pumped it.

"Edward, I thought this was all over." His mother had a tear threatening to come out of her eye.

"So did I." He quietly said. "I'm sorry."

She looked at him, with an even sadder look, she knew he had been trying hard to stay clean. Only a junior in high school, he had lived more than his mother would ever had wished.

"We want to send you to rehab." His mother said, not even sure if the words came out.

"Please mom, don't." Eward sat up pleading. "I need to stay here, I need to be with you guys." Esme just shook her head sadly. "Mom, what about Jeremy? What about Bella?"

"Edward, I know you tried, but...you need help." He sat up all the way now.

"Mom, please!" He was yelling, "Give me one more chance, it was just a slip up, I promise. "

She was crying harder now, she shook her head, pulled away her hand, and left the room.

He got up to follow her. Pulling at his IV's "Mom!" He called, "I'm sorry." He got to the doorway, and looked up to see his entire family standing in front, comforting Esme. "I'm sorry." He said, reaching for Alice, the closest.

She flinched at his touch, remembering the times she had tried so hard to forget and forgive him for. "No, Edward. Not this time." She walked away.

Edward slumped down to the floor, as a nurse came and gave him sedatives. The last thing he saw, before slipping back into a deep sleep, was his family looking down on him, disappointed again.

Bella was met at the airport by her grandparents, she quickly said her hellos, wanting to see Max. As soon as her and Charlie got settled in their hotel, she called Max, asking if she could come over.

She ran the ten blocks to his house, and was met by him outside. He grabbed her in a big hug, and held on tight. "Can't breathe." She finally said.

"I have a surprise." He said putting her down, leading her inside. They got in and all the lights were off, as soon as he reached for the light switch, all of their friends jumped up saying, "Surprise."

Bella's night was filled with hugs, sharing memories, and catching up on everything she had missed. She told everyone about her life in Forks, leaving out her boyfriend.

As the night wore on, the party seemed to die down. The door opened, and Garret, the biggest druggie in all of London walked in, "Let the party begin!" He said, handing out assorted drugs to anyone who wanted them. "Bella, good to see you." Bella had never been into drugs, and had never been friends with him, but she hugged him anyways. He handed her some pills, she had no idea what they were. She saw Max receive the same thing. If this had been happening before she went to Forks, she would not have participated, and neither would most of the people in the room. Almost everyone was putting the foreign pill in their mouths, including Max. Wanting to feel closer to her old friends, Bella took the pills, and washed them down with a random drink that was pushed into her hand.

She began dancing with everyone, the music was loud, and would have been reason for complaint if anyone in the neighborhood actually cared. After a while she began to feel dizzy, but she kept dancing. After what seemed like hours, she slumped on the couch. She was joined shortly by Max. He seemed much more energized than she was, and she was sure that he had taken more pills.

"How do you like the party?" He asked her.

"It's great!" she said, trying to match his mood with her voice.

He smiled at her, and put an arm around her shoulders. Before she knew what was happening, he had his hand all over her, and his lips pressed against hers. Edward had been the only guy she ever kissed, and she enjoyed the feeling she got as Max was kissing her.

He looked up at her to make sure she was okay with it. She was about to get up and walk away when she remembered Rachel. Edward had Rachel before Bella. Bella had no one.

Max seemed to sense her doubt. "He'll never know." He said, whispering in her ear.

Bella wasn't sure if it was the drugs, the alcohol, or jealousy, but she took her word for it, and leaned in to kiss him again. His hand were in her hair, and he pulled her closer. His tongue slipped in between her lips, scaring her just a little. As she got used to it, he pulled her onto his lap. She liked kissing him, it was very different than kissing Edward.

He lifted her up and carried her towards the stairs. She opened her eyes and pulled away as they got to the top of the stairs. "I can't" She said, gasping for air.

"Bella..." He replied obviously annoyed. He took her to his room anyways, and set her down on the bed, "At least let me kiss you." He leaned in again and kissed her, pinning her to the bed. They were on the bed making out for over an hour, he respected her, and didn't push her to go any further. When they finally pulled away, completely out of breath, Bella couldn't help but smile. She wrapped her arms around him and fell asleep.

Edward woke up again, this time alone. At first he didn't remember where he was, but he slowly realized he was in his hospital bed. The window showing the hallway was slightly open, and he could see his parents outside talking. Alice could be seen at the other end of the hallway, her eyes red and puffy. He remembered grabbing her. He smacked his own forehead. How could he. He had hurt her enough already, and now he was scaring her.

Alice sat in the chair, refusing to talk to anybody. Edward didn't hurt her, and his eyes didn't look like they had before, they looked sad, but she was scared nonetheless.

"Alice?" Her mother came to stand next to her, she placed a hand on her arm. "You should go home, he doesn't need you right now." The others had gone home long before.

"I want to stay." Was all Alice managed to get out.

"Honey, just get some rest."

Alice shook her head. "I don't want him to go back." She was talking about how things had been when he first started drinking and doing drugs. He had come home one night, high on only god knows what. Alice had been the only one home. He was angry about something, and Alice tried to calm him down. He turned his anger on her. She cringed just thinking about it.

"Mom, we need to help him." She stuttered.

Esme wrapped her arms around her daughter, and hugged her, remembering the last time they had been so close.

_Esme and Carlisle had gone out for dinner. When they returned, they heard screaming coming from in the house. They walked into the living room, the place was completely trashed. Another scream came from upstairs. "Stay here." Carlisle had said, as he crept up the stairs towards the sound. Esme knew who was screaming, it was Alice, she couldn't stand there waiting. She ran and pushed past Carlisle. As she got to the top of the stairs, she could see Alice at the end of the hall, lying on the floor. Edward was standing over her. He let out a yell. _

_"Edward!" Esme screamed, appalled at what her son had done. She rushed forward, not concerned with her own safety, just as Edward punched Alice again. "What is wrong with you?" _

_Carlisle came and grabbed Edward from behind. He pushed him into another room. Esme reached for the phone, about to call the police. "No mom." Alice squeaked out, obviously in pain._

_"Honey, I need to call the police." Esme had already started dialing._

_"No, mom. It's not his fault. He must have been given bad drugs. Please, they'll just put him in jail." Esme wrapped her arms around Alice and held her until she fell asleep. Edward had finally passed out._

Esme cried, remembering how difficult things were for a while after that.

Edward was still watching from his room. He walked over to the door, and opened it. "Mom." He called, "I'm ready to go to rehab." His mother looked up, and smiled at him, nodding her head.

**A/N: As always, thank you for reading, and for reviewing. Your suggestions and critiques help more than you can imagine. **

**Thank you to IamyourVAMPIRE for giving me some inspriation when I was stuck!**

**And you should all know that I am having the worst day ever, and I am not in the mood to write, if I did, they would probably all kill eachother, and no one wants to see that.**

**So you probably won't have another chapter for a few days.**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Sorry it took so long guys, as you all know, the DVD came out on Sat. I went to a release party, and have been watching it pretty much ever since.**

**But here is your next chapter. Hope you like it. If you don't let me know.**

Bella woke up, still next to Max.

"Good morning." He said, when he realized she was awake.

Her head hurt, but she smiled at him, she really needed some water. She got out of bed, and made her way downstairs. There were three people sleeping on the couch, and even more sleeping on the floor. She walked through to the kitchen. As she was getting a bottle of water from the fridge, she noticed her phone sitting on the table. She didn't remember leaving it there the night before. She picked it up to see that she had three missed calls, one was from Charlie and the other two from Alice.

She listened to her messages. Charlie had called to tell her he was going to bed, and that she should call him when she woke up. The second was from Alice, asking her to call her. She deleted both and called Charlie, only to get his voice mail. She left him a message, promising to return to the hotel around four, so they could see some sights before joining her grandparents for dinner. If she had sensed the urgency in Alice's voice, she might have called her back. But too many times Alice had called, asking Bella to call her back as soon as possible, just to tell her about the new outfit she had just picked out. Instead, she closed her phone, and looked around the kitchen, setting out to make breakfast for the remaining party guests.

They released Edward from the hospital, only after his parents had promised to bring him to rehab later in the day. They rode home in silence, no one knowing what to say. The left Edward in his room to pack some clothes, but Alice came in and sat on his bed next to the bag he was packing.

"Did you call Bella?" He asked her.

"Yeah, but I got her voice mail." She replied, eying the shirt he was putting in.

"Don't tell her." He said, his eyes begging.

Alice looked up surprised, "Why?" She asked.

"I don't want to disappoint her too."

Alice just nodded her head. "You have to tell her." She stated, turning to walk out.

"I don't want to ruin her trip."He replied. Alice nodded her head, pulling the door closed.

Edward went back to packing his bag. He had been told to bring only the essential clothing. He decided that impressing people in rehab wasn't important, so most of his clothes were sweatpants and sweatshirts. His mother was grabbing all of his things from the bathroom. He sat on his bed waiting, when Esme came in, she said nothing, only placed the plastic bag in his duffel.

"Your father will drive you." She said leaving him alone once again.

He followed her out, bringing his bag with him. His father took the bag, and loaded it into the car. Esme followed them outside, as Edward was about to get in the car, she rushed forward to hug him. He had not wanted his sibling to be there, but Alice came out anyways.

"Alice." He said through the window, wanting to apologize.

"Don't say anything." She said interrupting him, "Just come home fast."

He nodded his head and gave her a sad smile. Carlisle got in the car and they drove the three and a half hours in uncomfortable silence.

Bella served everyone breakfast, it was expected that some people would sleep over, so they had stocked up ob breakfast food. As everyone left, Max took Bella out to the mall. The weather was surprisingly good, so they walked.

"About last night." He said, as they walked around looking at all the stars.

"It's okay." Bella said, when he paused.

"No, you have a boyfriend." Max said.

"Yeah..." Bella thought for a moment, "Maybe." Max looked at her confused. "All I'm saying is, it's okay." She said again looking at him.

Max smiled, hoping she was saying what he thought.

After circling the entire mall, they found themselves at the movie theater. They decided to spend the next few hours, watching a movie. As they sat in the theater, Max leaned over, and put his arm around her. He silently leaned in to kiss her on the cheek. She smiled at him, and returned her attention to the movie. He spent the rest of the movie, worrying if he was going to fast for Bella, and trying to figure out if she really did have a boyfriend or not, so he kept his hands to himself.

Bella spent her entire trip with Max, with the exception of a few days her grandmother whisked her away for shopping. She spent Valentine's Day with a small group of friends. She made out with Max a few times, but she never let it get any farther than that. Though she loved being back in London with all of her old friends, she was excited to be going home. On the last day of her trip she was suddenly riddled with guilt. She realized what she had done, and what it could do to Edward. She called his cell phone, it went straight to voice mail.

"Hey Edward!" She sighed, "Um, we need to talk. I'll be home tonight, or tomorrow, I forget with the time difference. But I'll call you later. Love you." With that she hung up and continued packing her bag. She thought of all the ways she could tell Edward. She didn't sleep with Max, but she still felt guilty for kissing him.

When her plane landed the next day, she still hadn't decided what to say to him.

"Going to Edward's?" Charlie asked, as the walked in the house.

She thought for a minute, "No, I'm tired, I'll just see him tomorrow." She went up to her room, and unpacked her bags. When she was finished, she set her alarm, and went to bed, it was about two in the afternoon.

She woke up, completely refreshed. She was in a good mood, and was excited to see all her friends, and especially Edward. She hadn't realized how much she missed them, until she saw the school. She had driven slow, trying to make her vacation last longer, but as soon as she saw the flag hanging in front of the school, she became excited. She parked quickly, and ran into the school, waiting in the hallway, in their usual spot. Students started filing in, a few waved to Bella, or said hello from across the hall, but she still hadn't seen any of the faces she longed for.

"What do we say?" Alice was panicking in the car on the way to school. She was in the back, with Jasper, Emmet and Rosalie up front.

"You'll think of something." Rosalie said, not really caring.

"Why do I have to?" She whined, looking at everyone, hoping they would take on the responsibility.

"Because you're her friend." Emmet said, swerving in between the two slow cars in front of them.

"You're her friends too!" Alice was starting to get angry.

"You're closer to her." Jasper said, she seemed to calm down.

"True." She replied. They arrived at the school and they walked in together. Bella was at the end of the hallway in their usual spot. "He Bella!" Alice called.

"Hey Alice." She was looking around, obviously for Edward.

"Edward isn't here." Alice said, frowning, "He went to visit our aunt in Alaska, it was spur of the moment, but he wanted me to tell you he misses you."

"Oh." Bella looked so sad. "When will he be back?"

"I don't know, he might be gone a while..." Alice didn't want to tell her that he would be gone for almost a month, at the least.

Bella looked hear broken, "Okay...Tell him to call me if you get the chance." With that she grabbed her bag and walked to her first class, by herself.

Alice let one tear slip out of her eye, "What's wrong?" Emmet asked her, before heading to his class with Rosalie.

"He can't call her!" She said in a sharp whisper. "Bella....poor Bella..." She walked away, still mumbling to herself, not even bringing Jasper with her. Her family stayed at the end of the hallway, watching her walk away, not knowing who to feel worse for, Bella or Alice. But they all forgot the person who was feeling the worst.

Edward was sitting at the lunch table, looking at the clock, realizing that Bella would be eating lunch too. He sighed, as the nurse brought him a tray. He said nothing, just like every other day he had been there. The nurse was young, and pretty, but she seemed very motherly.

"What's wrong dear?" She asked, sitting down next to him.

At first he didn't know what to say, "I miss someone." he stated simply.

"Most people here do." She smiled at him sadly, she seemed to understand. "You seem to be doing well."

"Yeah, it was juts a relapse. Something stupid, I shouldn't have done." He put his head in his hands, ignoring his food.

"Keep that in your head, and you should be out of here in no time." he sat up at the mention of going home. "I've seen so many people come through here, and the ones that realize their mistake right away, are the ones that don't come back."

Edward thanked her for the encouragement as she got up, and went to visit the others. He found himself venturing over to another table, something he had not done yet. He sat down. Everyone at the table looked at him, not sure what to think, but then they smiled and welcomed him in their group. He found himself listening to their stories, well after the rest of the people in the room had left.

They told him stories, many of them sad, but still a few were happy, or at least seemed to be turning out happy. He knew the time would come, but he tried to put off the question, by asking questions of his own.

Finally, during a lull in the conversation, some one turned to him, and asked it. "What are you here for?"

Edward thought of the best way to start. At the beginning? "Well." He decided to mimic their stories, and tell it all, holding nothing back. "I started partying in 9th grade, got a girl pregnant, beat up my sister, was sent to rehab, got clean, stayed clean for my son, and relapsed when my girlfriend told me she wasn't going to spend Valentine's Day with me."

They all stared at him, his story had been the shortest, but the most to the point as well. He had told the truth for the first time, and he felt compelled to continue. "I let my whole family down. When I saw my sister cry, that was it. I know I need help. That's why I'm here."

They nodded, they knew not to pry any further. Although happy to be talking to people, Edward had been warned about getting too close to people, so he left and went to his room.

Bella went through the next week in a complete daze, she kept to herself mostly. She went to school, did her work, and went home. Even Charlie had noticed something wrong. Alice was becoming worried about her, she obviously felt abandoned by Edward, if only Bella knew why Edward really was gone, she might understand. Alice found herself waking up everyone, trying to decide whether or not to tell Bella, and everyday, she was talked out of it by her family, them reassuring her that Edward would tell her when she needed to know. Still Alice kept her eye on Bella, even asking her over, to which she declined.

It was Saturday morning when the phone rang. Alice, the only one awake at the ungodly hour, answered the phone cheerily (hoping it would be Edward) to find Rachel on the other end.

"Hi, is Edward there?" She asked, sounding quite anxious.

"No, he's in Alaska, can I help you?" Alice had never been too close to Rachel, but still felt a connection to her.

"I actually need someone to watch Jeremy, my grandmother isn't doing very well, and I just don't want him around right now." Rachel said, desperately.

"I'll come get him." Alice said, writing down the address. She ran outside, taking Edward's car, since it already had the car seat, and went to pick up Jeremy.

When she arrived, Rachel already had bags packed for him. "Wow." Alice said, "He sure needs a lot of stuff." Eying the bags.

"Yeah, depending on how my grandmother does, could he spend the night?" Rachel asked, helping Alice carry some of the bags out.

"Yeah, I'm sure everyone will be fine with it."

They exchanged phone numbers, and Alice out Jeremy in the car. Rachel leaned down, and looked at Jeremy. "Goodbye buddy. I love you." She kissed him, and shut the car door.

Alice said goodbye to Rachel and started to drive away, she looked in the rear view mirror, and would have sworn Rachel was crying, _Bad week_, Alice thought, as she drove to her house.

When she arrived, sher family was up, and surprised to see her come in with Jeremy. "Rachel called, she was desperate." Alice explained, as Esme took Jeremy out of her arms.

Bella was looking at the picture of Edward, Jeremy and Her. It was taken at Christmas, the last time she felt really close to Edward. He hadn't been answering her calls, or returning her messages, and she was beginning to wonder if he was just ignoring her. She had started sulking, even she could tell that now. She needed to have some fun. She heard the doorbell ring, and ran down to answer it.

She opened it to see Jake, Charlie's friend from the reservation.

"Hey, Charlie isn't here, he should be back around six." Bella said, expecting him to leave.  
"Actually," he said, taking a step in, "I came to see you. Charlie mentioned you had been down a little, and I wanted to take you out for some fun."

Bella smiled, she did need to get out of the house.

"I was thinking the beach." He said.

"It's cold!" Bella replied.

"We aren't going to swim!" Jake replied, seeing her expression. "We'll just sit and talk."

Suddenly, talking to Jacob seemed so much better than sitting and sulking about Edward.

They drove down to the beach, and found a nice dry spot on a cliff, in full view of the ocean. Their conversation started as just small talk, mostly their excitement of the upcoming warm weather. Eventually they got to talking about her trip to London.

"I cheated on Edward." Bella blurted out with thinking, covering her mouth immediately.

"What?" Jake had always thought of Bella as the good girl, and had never expected that.

"Well, I didn't sleep with him, I mean, I was in his bed, but...you know. I still feel bad." Bella stumbled through her words.

Jacob wasn't sure what to say, this seemed to be more girl talk to him. "Why?" asked, thinking it was the only thing he could say.

"I felt distant from Edward... and now I feel even more distant." Bella said slowly, making sure the words came out right. "Sorry, we don't have to talk about it." She said, sensing his discomfort.

"It's okay," He said, "I don't mind." But Bella stopped talking about it anyways, she felt she had said too much already. They talked about school for a while, and then headed back to Bella's.

"Thank you Jake, I really needed today." She said, hugging him goodbye.

"No problem Bella." He drove away, waving at the end of the block.

Bella went in the house and made dinner for her and Charlie. Charlie was surprised to see Bella in such a good mood. She seemed almost back to normal.

"What made you so happy?" He asked, just curious.

"I had a good day." She said simply.

**A/N: Thanks for reading! Please review, it really helps. Any ideas would be greatly appreciated. I know how it ends, I'm just not sure how to get there yet.**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Sorry this one took so long to write. It's finals week. And my world is falling apart, pretty much literally. Anyways, I'm on spring break in a few days, so I shoudl be able to get out another chapter soon.**

"I thought she would be back by now." Alice said, as the family sat down to dinner.

"Did you try calling?" Esme asked, cutting up Jeremy's food.

"Yeah, she didn't answer." It had been more than a week since Rachel had called asking if Jeremy could stay with them.

"You don't think..." Emmet trailed off, not wanting to say what everyone was thinking.

Esme spoke up first, "No, she wouldn't leave her son." But even though she sounded so confident, she had not convinced herself.

They ate silently, each of them taking a turn to stare at Jeremy. He was eating quickly, as if he was in a rush. "Dada?" He asked, looking at their faces.

Esme smiled at him, "No honey, not yet."

"When will he be home?" Alice asked.

"Hopefully next week, they say he's doing well." Esme smiled as she talked, the doctors had only reported good things about Edward.

They began talking in small groups, about Edward's return, when the doorbell rang. It was about seven o'clock, and no one was expected.

Alice jumped up and ran to the door, curious to see who it was. She opened it to see Bella, standing in the rain.

"I need to talk to Edward." Bella said, allowing herself in.

"He isn't here." Alice replied following her, into the living room.

"I know, and he isn't answering his phone. Can I have you aunt's number? It's really important."

"Umm...." Alice wasn't sure what to say.

Esme came in the room at the perfect time, "Bella... Edward isn't with his aunt. We can't tell you where he is, but he will when he gets back."

Bella frowned, most likely at the fact that they had lied to her, "When will he be back?"

"Next weekend." Esme said, looking at Bella apologetically.

Bella didn't say anything, she just turned and walked out the door, leaving the family to finish their dinner. The only one who spoke, was Jeremy, saying "Dada?" Over and over, him receiving sad looks every time.

Bella laid on her bed and looked up at the ceiling. She hadn't spoken with Max since the day she came home, and now she didn't plan on it. A few tears slipped out, uncontrolled. She could hear Charlie watching the game downstairs, and she contemplated joining him, but only for a moment. She quickly decided against it, and went out the back door for a jog. She went into the woods, to the place where she first spoke to Edward, and lay down. She wished he was there with her, she needed him there. She stayed there for over and hour, before walking back to her house.

She entered into the silent house, trying not to make any noise. As soon as she got to her room, she fell on her bed, and let some much needed sleep take over, she had spent so much of the last two weeks worrying, and she deserved a good night's sleep.

Edward was excited to be going home. He was leaving earlier than expected, partly because of his progress, and partly because of room shortages. He had volunteered to leave, and his doctors were confident that he would be fine. He didn't tell his family, and took a taxi home, in hopes of surprising them. As he pulled up to the house, he was overcome with joy. He let himself in the front door, and found the house was empty. While waiting for his family to return, he went to his room to unpack his bags.

After what seemed like forever, he heard a door opening downstairs, and he could hear his family coming in. He exited his bedroom, and stood at the top of the stairs, Alice was the first to see him, "Oh, hi Edward." She said, calmly and casually, walking into the living room. The rest of the family stopped and stared, silent. Alice came walking backwards out of the kitchen, and looked up to the top of the stairs, making sure she was really seeing him. "Edward!" She yelled, running up the stairs to him, wrapping him in a hug.

"Nice to see you Alice!" He said, hugging her back, promising himself never to hurt her again.

"Why are you here? I mean I'm glad, but we weren't expecting you for at least a week."

"Good behavior?" He replied shrugging, looking behind her to see Esme coming up the stairs with Jeremy.

"We've had a little guest with us, while you were gone." Esme said, turning Jeremy so he could see in front of him.

"Dada!" He screamed out happily reaching for Edward, who excitedly took him.

"Rachel seems to have...disappeared." Esme said, "So Jeremy has been with us."

The news both worried Edward and pleased him at the same time. It had always been his dream to have his son living with him, but where was Rachel.

"When you're done saying hi to your son, I suggest you call your girlfriend." Alice said, giving Edward a slightly threatening look, "She's been worried."

"I'll call her in a few minutes." He looked around at his family, glad to be home, and again, promising not to hurt them.

Edward took his son up to his room, while Alice worked on moving all Jeremy's things from Esme and Carlisle's room to his, setting it all up in a corner. Jeremy seemed to have a lot of things, raising even more suspicion of Rachel's disappearance.

"Where is your mother?" Edward asked Jeremy, laying him down for a nap. He sat and watched his son sleeping for a moment, realizing how much of his life he had actually missed.

Bella picked up her phone, and looked at the caller ID, the person she had been waiting for was finally calling, but she wasn't sure if she wanted to answer. What would she tell him, what would say to her? Her fingered lingered over the answer button, until the ringing stopped, she just couldn't make herself answer it.

After a few minutes, of her just staring at the phone, it rang again. This time, she answered, "Hello?" She said, already knowing who it was.

"Bella!" Edward's cheery voice made her smile, "I missed you so much. I need to see you, what are you doing tonight? We could go to a movie or something."

Bella still hadn't said anything, but she was smiling, "I'm not doing anything, I'd love to hang out. You're back early. I was at your house last night, and they said you wouldn't be home until next week."

"I got let out early." He said, realizing she had no idea what he was talking about.

"What do you mean?"

"I'll explain when I see you tonight. I''ll pick you up at seven."

"Okay, see you then, I love you."

"Love you too." Her heart soared, it felt like she was hearing those words for the first time.

Edward hang up the phone, and headed out to the backyard to walk around. He had found a new appreciation for life, and he cherished every moment he had. The trees were more beautiful than he had imagined, and he could hear the river not too far away, the sound of the rushing water calmed him, in ways he, at one point, didn't think was possible.

As he walked, he thought of ways to tell Bella. He knew he would have to tell her where he had been.

He wasn't aware of it, but Bella sat in her bed, contemplating how to tell Edward. How do you tell someone you love, something that could break their heart. How do you tell them, with out lying.

She sat up and walked over to her computer, she had many unopened emails, mostly from Max. She opened them, knowing she wouldn't reply. Mostly, they just asked how she was, and why she hadn't replied to any of his emails yet. She exited the window, and turned off the computer. She sighed, and she heard a knock on the door.

It opened to reveal Charlie. "Did you tell him?" Charlie asked, having overheard part of her conversation.

She shook her head, "Not yet, I'll try to tell him tonight."

He just nodded his head, looking at her sadly. "What are you going to do?"

She had thought of this, but still hadn't come to a conclusion. "I don't know." He walked over and hugged her, "Thanks for understanding." Bella said, hugging him back.

"Of course, it's not your fault." Even though he said it a hundred times already, Bella still felt like it was.

Edward was hurrying around the house, getting ready to pick up Bella, "You sure you don't mind watching him." He asked, as Alice came into the room with Jeremy.

"Edward, would I ever pass up a chance to be with my little nephew." She kissed Jeremy's cheek, and carried him into the living room.

Edward was anxious, he kept looking at the clock, waiting for the time he could go pick up Bella. The clock seemed to tick even slower.

He grabbed his keys, deciding she wouldn't be upset if he was early, and ran out to his car.

Bella was ready, waiting in the living room, so she could see his car pull up. She looked up every time a car would go by, hoping it was him, but dreading it at the same time.

Finally a car pulled up in the driveway, she ran out to meet him, and he was already leaning against the car, waiting. He opened his arms as she ran to him, and wrapped her in a hug.

"Edward," she said, breathing in his scent. They stood there, just holding each other, probably longer than they should have. She let a single tear of joy fall from her eyes, as she got in the car.

He held her hand as they drove to the movie theater, and as they walked in. He was just glad to be back with her.

They payed no attention to the movie, and they payed little attention to each other, they were both off in their own thoughts, a silent debate was taking place in each of their minds.

Edward wrapped his arm around her as they exited the theater, leading her to the restaurant. She smiled up at him, neither one of them brave enough to break the silence that had built between them.

They ordered their food, still not saying a words to each other. As soon as the waiter walked away, Edward grabbed Bella's hand.

"I need to tell you something." He said, in a voice that scared her slightly. She looked up into his eyes, trying to get some hint of what he would say. His eyes revealed nothing. "I wasn't at my Aunt's." He started.

"I know, Alice told me." Bella interrupted.

"Did she tell you where I was?"

Bella shook her head, "She said you would tell me."

He took a deep breath, all the practicing in the woods, had not made this any easier. "I was in Rehab." Her face changed suddenly, becoming shocked, but also concerned. "I relapsed after you left."

"Edward...If I knew that would have happened, I would have stayed." She immediately felt guilty.

"No. Bella, it isn't your fault. It's mine." He grabbed her hand again. "You didn't do anything."

"But, if I was here, it wouldn't have happened." She sounded as if she was going to cry, but she was determined to hold the tears back.

"Bella, when I was in Rehab, I thought of you. You are the reason I got out so early. Please don't blame yourself." He added, seeing her face.

"Edward, everything is my fault." Bella said, disappointed.

"No, nothing is your fault." He moved closer to her, and wrapper her in his arms.

"I should have stayed in London."

He was the one that was shocked now. "Bella, I never would have met you then."

"Maybe that would have been best." Bella got up, and walked out of the restaurant, leaving him at the table.

He sat there, not knowing what to do, when his phone vibrated. "I just need time to think." The text message said, from Bella.

"Call me when you are ready." He replied.

She walked home, it wasn't too far, and she needed some time. She walked into the house to find Charlie sitting at the kitchen table, waiting for her.

"Did you tell him?" He asked, taking a sip of coffee.

"No. He was in Rehab though. That's where he's been. I can't tell him now."

"When will you tell him then?" Charlie asked.

"I have no idea." She turned and walked up to her room, ignoring the questioning and concerned look on his face.

She sat with the phone in her hand, numbers dialed, just not able to push the green button. She dreaded the conversation, which would probably end badly. She contemplated all the different ways she could say it. She could be blunt, and just come out with the information. Or she could ease the information out, slowly. She finally decided on game plan, one she was sure to be easiest on her.

Each ring of the phone made her grow more anxious. "Hello?" He finally answered.

She had not expected to react so terribly to his voice. She felt as if she was going to break down crying, but she didn't. "Hey Max." She said, after regathering her thoughts.

"Bella, I haven't heard from you in a while. How have you been?" He asked, helping her along with step one of her plan, to ease him into conversation.

"I'm doing okay, a little sick, but otherwise I'm fine. How are you?" She tried to sound completely sincere.

"I miss you. Wish you would come back." She could hear him smiling through the phone.

"You know I can't. Hey I wanted to ask you a question." she said, beginning step two of her plan, just coming out with it.

"Shoot." He said, waiting.

"The night of the party....did we...do anything?" She sat quietly, waiting for his answer.

She could hear him breathing, and thought she heard him sigh. "I hoped you wouldn't remember."

"That's the thing...I don't. I was really drunk, and I think high." She said. Ready to hang up on him, she was getting angry.

"I'm sorry Bella. I know I shouldn't have. I've always loved you, and I feel terrible." He went on, continuing to say how sorry he was. He couldn't hear the tears, but he heard her sigh.

The next part was the hardest. "I'm pregnant." She said.

She waited for an answer, but it never came. She sat there, hoping he was just out of words. But she heard a click, and a dial tone. He had hung up.

She dialed again, this time a different number. "Edward?" She said, before he had even said hello.

"Bella, I'm so glad you called." he was about to keep talking, but she cut him off.

"I slept with Max in London. Well, I passed out, and he had sex with me." she let this sink in for a moment. "I'm pregnant." she said, expecting him to hang up, just like Max had. She listened for the click and dial tone, but it never came. "Edward?" she asked, only to hear him breathing in reply.

For the second time in his life, Edward was left completely speechless. Only this time, he couldn't fall back on drugs and alcohol to help him. He just couldn't let himself do that again.

**A/N: Okay, now you all probably hate me. I hope not though. Please review. It really helps me when people ask questions, or tell me what they would like to happen (no promises though) **


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: This chapter is dedicated to the vampire in my life. Who, when finding out about the baby, ran to hug his mother and eat a Lollipop.**

They sat, just listening to the other breathe. It seemed like hours to both, but in reality was only a few minutes.

"Edward?" Bella asked again, scared of what he might say.

"Yeah," he said, just letting her know he was there. He heard a noise behind him and turned to see Alice in the doorway. 'What's wrong?' She mouthed, seeing his face.

"Edward, please talk to me." Bella pleaded.

"I'll come pick you up." he said into the phone.

She whispered "Okay." But he heard, and they both hung up.

He turned back to look at Alice, who had placed herself on the edge of the bed.

"What's wrong?" she said out loud this time.

Edward opened his mouth to tell her, but nothing came out. He breathed in sharply, unable to speak.

"Edward?" Alice could tell something was wrong. "You can tell me."

He shook his head, unable to form a sentence. He got up and walked out of the room. He walked down the stairs and found his mom in the living room.

He opened his mouth again, but still nothing came out. She looked at him, and then at Alice, who had followed him down, just shrugged her shoulders.

Edward sat next to his mom on the couch, and leaned into her, as she wrapped her arms around him in a hug. "What's wrong?" She asked. When she didn't answer, she just held him tighter.

He wasn't crying, because he didn't know how to react. He was just sitting there, in his mothers arms, being held like a baby.

Alice had left the room, but she came back a few minutes later, with a lollipop.

"You used to do this, when you first came here, and lollipops always made you happy." She handed it to him.

He took it and smiled "Thanks," He was barely able to get out. "Bella..." He just couldn't say anymore.

"What about Bella?" Esme asked, the worst going through her head. "Is she alright? Is she in the hospital?"

Edward just shook his head. "I have to go." He said, getting up. His mother followed him to the door, and hugged him as he left. She asked no more questions, just watched him as he left the property, hoping he would be okay.

Alice was thinking the same thing, but she decided to follow him. She sneaked out and got into her car, trying to make it so no one would know she was following him.

When Edward arrived at Bella's house, she was already sitting outside waiting for him. She got up from her spot on the front step, and slowly walked to the car, feeling like a child who was about to get yelled at. But as she sat down, he did not yell at her, he didn't say anything. She buckled her seatbelt, and he drove away from her house. They went to the beach, neither of them noticing Alice behind them.

They sat on the beach, silent. After a few minutes, Edward reached over and grabbed Bella's hand. "What are you going to do?" He asked her.

She looked up at him surprised, "You aren't mad?" She asked.

He smiled slightly, just trying to make the atmosphere lighter, "No, why would I be mad at you. He took advantage of you. It's not your fault." As the words left his mouth, he realized how true they were. At first he had been saying them only to comfort Bella, but now he believed them.

"I don't know." Bella said, putting her head on her lap, not letting go of Edward's hand. "What do I do?" She asked him, turning her head so she could see him.

He sighed, and listed everything he could think of. "You could get an abortion," he cringed just saying it, and gladly saw that she was shaking her head. "You could give it up for adoption." She took in a breath, thinking about it. But Edward knew she could never do it. "You could keep it." He said.

She sat silent for a minute, thinking. "Why do I have to choose?" She asked, but no answer was needed, she knew why.

"You won't be by yourself, I'll help you." Edward said to her. He then thought of Jeremy, probably still asleep in his room, and he smiled, "I think you should keep it." He said.

Alice had been a little ways behind them, hidden so they wouldn't see, but close enough to hear every word. At first she had no idea what they were talking about, but it soon became obvious. She gasped as she put it together in her mind, then she ran back to her car and drove home, knowing too much already.

"Okay." Bella said, after a long time. "I'll keep it." She still sounded disappointed.

"Bella," Edward wrapped his arms around her, "This doesn't have to be a bad thing. Maybe a bad time, but not a bad thing."

She nodded her head, many women would be thrilled to be having a baby, so she would try to take it more positively. "Thanks Edward."

They sat there, and watched the sun go down, before Edward dropped Bella off at her house, and went back to his.

Alice was waiting in the living room when he got home, hoping he would tell her. "What's wrong?" She asked the second he walked through the door.

"Nothing anymore." He said, as he walked up the stairs to his room.

This scared Alice, 'Could Bella have chosen to get an abortion?' She thought. Alice knew how emotionally hard it was on people who had abortions. And then she thought of Edward and how he acted when he told her, 'Is Edward making her get an abortion?'

Alice thought she had heard everything on the beach, but what she didn't hear, was probably the most important thing, because her thoughts kept going to her little niece or nephew growing inside Bella. 'Maybe Edward just doesn't want another kid.' She told herself, before combating it with, 'But what if Bella does?' Exhausted, Alice went up to her room to sleep, but she would get none, for her thoughts were wrapped around the little baby, who's fate she still didn't know.

Bella had asked Edward to tell his parents, even though it wasn't his, she felt like they should know. "What do you want me to tell them?" He asked, before she had gotten out of the car.

"What ever you want." She said.

"Do you want me to tell them it's mine?" He had no problem lying for her.

"No, don't tell them who's it is. They will probably assume it's yours, and I'll correct them when I'm ready."

Edward nodded his head, "I love you."

"I love you too." They were now reconnected.

Edward walked right into Carlisle's office, to find both him and Esme talking.

"I need to tell you something." This statement was met with their questioning looks. "Bella, is pregnant."

Neither of them said anything, but Edward knew what they were thinking. They were wondering how they had raised such an irresponsible son. And he had no problem with them thinking that. It was better for them to be mad at Edward, than Bella.

"I'll let you guys talk." He said, "I'll be in my room if you need me." He turned and walked down the hall to his room.

Inside, he found Jeremy sleeping. He must have woken up and eaten, because he was in different clothes, the boy was such a messy eater.

"Hey Jeremy," Edward whispered. "You are going to be a big brother. Isn't that exciting." He turned and flopped on his bed, falling asleep almost instantly.

**A/N: Sorry it's so short. I'm leaving tomorrow, and won't be able to use a computer for about a week, so I figure I'd give you at least something.**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: So sorry everyone! Life has been very hectic, and I actually forgot about this story! Thanks to a certain reader who reminded me about it ;).**

**This chapter is very short, but I'll try to get another one up by the end of the week.**

"Edward?" Esme called, lightly knocking on the door. When he didn't answer, she opened it and walked in. Edward was in his bed sound asleep. Jeremy was in the crib at the foot. She smiled as she watched the sleep. The thought of another baby overwhelmed her, but she could not help but be excited at the same time. She had always dreamed of having many grandkids, but not this early.

She walked back out into the hallway, where Carlisle was waiting for her. They silently walked to their bedroom to get ready to sleep. "How could he let this happen again?" Carlisle asked, knowing Esme would not have an answer.

She just shook her head. "How do think Bella is taking it all? Charlie must know already..." She began to panic. "Do you think Charlie is mad? I wouldn't think so, but you never know. I don't think they have enough money to support a baby." She looked at her husband. "Maybe..." She wasn't quite sure how to say it. "Maybe we should offer her a place here?" She asked him.

"Esme, we already have our hands full. We don't have room. And now with Jeremy staying with us, for who knows how long..." He trailed off, seeing the disappointment in his wife's eyes. "Maybe we can figure something out." She hugged him. "Just don't say anything to Edward yet, let us work it out without them." She nodded. There was a knock at the door. "Come in." Carlisle called.

"Mom? Dad?" Alice walked in and sat on their bed. "Um...did Edward already tell you?"

"Yes." Esme said, wondering when Edward had a chance to tell Alice.

"Well, I think....Don't tell Edward I told you this...But I think they are leaning towards an abortion."

They looked at her, shocked. "What do you mean?" Carlisle asked.

"I heard them talking on the beach," The looked at her, confused, "I followed Edward." She explained, "They were talking about what to do, and they brought up abortion. It didn't sound like they were going to do it, but later when I asked him, he said everything had been taken care of."

They sat silently taking it in. "There's nothing we can do now, if they already did it." Carlisle said, "Let's leave it for tonight, we can all talk about it in the morning."

Alice nodded her head, and hugged both of her parents. "Goodnight." Her mother kissed her on the head and she walked out.

Before going to her own room, she walked over to Edward's room. The door was cracked a little, so she walked right in. They were both sleeping, so soundly. "Please let me be wrong." She whispered as she looked at Jeremy.

The next morning, it was silent at the breakfast table. The only one making noise was Jeremy, who would occasionally yell out, signaling he wanted more of something. Emmet had already left, saying something about hanging out with Rose, everyone was so preoccupied with their thoughts to notice his obvious absence. "We need to talk about this situation." Carlisle said.

"Dad." Edward nodded toward Alice.

"I already know Edward, I followed you to the beach. Sorry." she added, seeing his face.

"Anyways." Carlisle started. "We would like to know what you and Bella plan to do."

"Well, we'd really like to keep it." Edward was just as uncomfortable now, as he was when he told them about Jeremy. Alice looked relieved.

"And what does Charlie say about all this?" Esme wanted to know.

"He said that it is up to Bella, and that he will do all he can to help."

Esme looked at Carlisle, who nodded his head. "Edward." She started. "We have an idea. If you two choose to keep the baby, we would like you both to live here. We are going to build a little cottage in the back for you, so you guys are close, but have privacy. You, Bella, and both children can live out there, we will do all we can to help, but we want you to be responsible." Edward was shocked.

"We would like to know..." Carlisle started, "how you two could be so irresponsible."

Edward sat silently, he had no idea what to say. He did nothing wrong. And Bella did nothing wrong. But still they were left with the consequences. And he was willing to put up with any challenges that would be coming their way. "I guess..." He started, "Stuff just happens when you are in love."

**As always, reviews, suggestions and criticisms are welcome.**


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